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A Space for Grief during the Holidays

January 1, 2019, 4:50 PM

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By: Nikki Savage

 

The holidays are usually filled with cheer and gratitude.  With celebrations and busy schedules.  Sweet treats and joyful sounds.  But for those who are grieving, especially those who are going through their first holiday without someone they love, the holidays can bring up some feelings that aren’t joyful at all.

 

I want to speak to those of you this holiday who are grieving.  I want to offer a space for you who have lost this year.  A place where it’s okay not to smile, a place where tears are welcome.  I know it is hard to grieve during the holidays.  Not wanting to be the owner, not wanting to pull anyone out of their own festive joy.  It’s okay to make room for yourself to grieve.  And it is okay to immerse yourself in the holidays to escape the grief for a time too.  It is not right or wrong.

 

I find as time has moved along, the waves of grief hit less often but are a bit rougher when they do. Or maybe I don’t have the same stamina.  I’m not sure which.  But I don’t mind the pain.  I’ve gotten to know it and understand it’s workings on my heart.  I know grief isn’t fun but somehow I know grief is linked to love.  And I find a strange comfort in the strength of my grief, knowing it reflects the strength of my love.

 

But that will not be how grief manifests for everyone.   So if you know of anyone who may be grieving a loss this holiday, reach out.  Just to let them know you are there.  And hold space for them in whatever way they need.  Just being present can be all they need.  And if they don’t seem down, let them swim outside those waves and be happy with them.  As I said, everyone walks through grief in their own way.  But I think all who grieve appreciate knowing they don’t have to walk it alone.

 

For those who are grieving this season, I wish you grace.  I wish you comfort in the love that will always be there.  I wish you signs from the beyond and exhales and peace.   And I wish you the strength to keep your heart open to receiving that love that will always be there.  Even while your heart feels broken.  Most of all, I wish you the knowledge that you do not have to go it alone.  If you need support, please reach out for help.

 

Holding you in peace and light ~ Nikki

 

 

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